Why are we the humans more afraid of each other, yet not our Creator?
I have walked the path of a human scared to voice my words.
I feared all the humans and of all they would say or think about me. What would the painful words of these sharp swords do to me? Each morning as I had awakened yet to another blessed dream, my pen shivered in fear of the human mind.
I watched how one group of society would put down yet another group just to place themselves above all.
I watched how I was afraid of the human criticism. Yet, came in front of me, the critics. Every time I was afraid of them, I saw their own characteristics came to light. The ones who had criticized were the ones committing the crimes themselves but were yet in the closet. I wondered how could they do this?
How would you stand in front of the mirror and criticize yet another creation for his or her views yet you are not God.
Why was I so terrified of the humans yet I never feared my Lord, my Creator?
I spoke with my Lord every night, and everyday I would be in the embrace of my Lord, my Creator.
My tears rolled freely in front of my Creator without any hesitation or fear. Yet, in front of even the most trusted companion or friends, I smiled my fake smile and yet no one knew it was just a plastered face which had hidden all of my emotions.
I wondered why was I so scared of the humans, and refused to just being myself.
Why does everyone say, “Be yourself,” yet when you are your true self, everyone gives you a look and makes you feel so low.
Why do we make each other feel so low yet we are all only trying to gain some respect and acknowledgment from each other?
Why is it so easy to put someone down and walk away in peace, while the person you have degraded and humiliated is now going through a storm within his or her soul all because of your words?
Why don’t you too loose your sleep over your mean words and why don’t you have a thunderstorm within your house because of your sharp tongue?
I knew I had only one option, to first to change myself and not be bothered or happy by the comments of humans who don’t even remember their compliments or sharp tongue, yet put you in a war within your own conscious.
I decided to have faith within myself, my only complete truth, where there is no criticism and I know even when I am wrong I could pour all my tears and ask for forgiveness. Where I can pour all my thoughts out and not be criticized, where I am just that, my complete self. I opened up to my Lord, my Creator. As my dreams guided me throughout the thunderstorms of my life, I had written all my dreams within my private diaries where there was only one witness and one complete truth, myself. My Lord is always there guiding me through my personal dreams.
I had now within my hands, my dream diaries, my personal prayer book, and my personal spiritual quotations.
I know if I was a man or a saint or a well known person, my words would make it within the front pages of the newspapers. I knew it matters not where my words land up or within which hands they are accepted or declined. I just had to write all the sacred letters within the pages of the human history. I must now bring out these sacred letters from my chest and pour them within the chests of the seekers and wonderers of this universe.
Maybe someone out there is awaiting for yet another chance to be heard, to be accepted, to let all the unkind hearts know please do not bring tears to another soul. Do not be the reason of grief to another home. I knew I must make all my letters public. So I have poured them out for you within my very personal Spiritual Collection all guided by my very personal dreams.
Please, I ask you all not to be the judge, for I believe in the One Judge. Let there be peace within this world and let us not judge each other or be the reason humans are so afraid of each other and not our Creator. Let there be peace on Earth as we the creation be only that, a creation.
Blessings From Seattle,
Ann Marie Ruby